Pieces of you

I feel like my heart is slowly breaking. I don't feel like its shattering, I just feel like certain pieces don't belong anymore. I think it's change. I don't like change. It means nothing in this world is permanent, and that is so scary. Sure things change for the better, but they can also change for the worst. Sometimes I just wonder if people truly change, or do we just start looking at them in a new light. When we see them in a new light, do they see us in a new light as well? I just want to know what he thinks of me. I feel like I've always kept him in my heart and mind ever since we stopped talking years ago. When he sees me on a daily basis, does he honestly not care that our friendship is no longer there? It hurts me to think he doesn't care. He has to care deep down, I know it. I feel like lately I've been giving little hints and signs that I want to be friends. I always would avoid him, and then senior year came and I didn't see the point of hiding from him anymore. I feel like we make a tiny step to regaining our friendship, and then just like that I am insecure about it all over agin. I just don't understand why I want him to accept me so bad. He is only one person.